I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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