Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
