And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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