Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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