Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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