He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
i've created a new STD.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
