dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
