The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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