At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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