If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
