Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Randomize
