dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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