I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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