I hate your face
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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