so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize