all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
