She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Randomize