What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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