quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
