My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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