woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
