Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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