By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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