All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
dude i'm inner monologue high
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
