Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
