Where did you get a picture of my penis
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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