It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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