Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
