butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I look better un-naked...
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
