apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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