Kiss
Puke
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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