I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
