wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
