so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize