I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize