please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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