Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I have tasted many bathrooms
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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