You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
