just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
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