her vagine was all disorganized.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
