Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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