I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize