GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
