My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
