batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize