He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
