Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
My vagina is very pro this idea
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
