If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
