the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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