The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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