i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
my being single is dangerous.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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