absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Randomize
