Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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